I believe that most of us would agree that our world is addicted to a “more is better” mentality, which, not surprisingly, causes far too many folks to repeatedly ask, “What’s next?” In other words, what next thing will scratch our itch?
The ever-increasing craving for an ever-diminishing pleasure is a failed experiment, but trying to understand and apply the concept, that maybe the more is better mantra, is not necessarily out there but right here. Becoming content is incredibly tough, even for the wealthiest man in history, John D. Rockefeller. When asked, “How much is enough?” his famous reply was, “Just a little bit more.”
Perhaps we should define what “being content” means. Since this is my column, I will interpret: Being content is being pleased and satisfied with our lives, not needing more. Unfortunately, for most of my life (up until about four years ago), I described contentment as accumulating enough wealth and possessions to make me feel secure even if it meant spending most of my life jumping from one thing to another while believing that life will be better after ____, fill in the blank.
While striving for contentment, I was moving so fast through life that I was under the curse of stress and irritability, which caused me to become what some would say; a curmudgeon! While I had accumulated enough money and things, I never grew rich in the things that matter most, which, ironically, aren’t things at all. How sad it is that so many of us fall in love with things that cannot love us back?
Regrettably, I was letting the questionable good things to replace the God things. My spirit was willing, but my flesh was weak! Nevertheless, I have been running all my life. I had to stop the craziness! I’m done, over and out! While I believe most of us equate contentment with being happy, we often seek the evasive happiness feeling in all the wrong places and things. I argue that the secret of happiness is found in developing the capacity to enjoy less.
Therefore, happiness is a byproduct of contentment.
Let me say it again but a little louder for those of you in the back, HAPPINESS IS A BYPRODUCT OF CONTENTMENT.
It was the legendary Hindu sage, Ramana Maharshi, who said, “All unhappiness is due to the ego. With it comes all your trouble. If you would deny the ego and scorch it by ignoring it you would be free.”
The problem is that our egos are tenacious buggers, as ego embodies the “after me I come first” way of thinking. What I find ironic is that deep inside most people there is a longing to stop the pushing and striving to get more and be more, but the “world” makes it so darn tempting by inundating us with the things of this world. The enemy’s goal is to create dissatisfaction and unhappiness in us, unless, of course, we make another Amazon purchase, buy more clothes, a new car or a larger home. Sadly, the idea of just slowing down and enjoying what we have in front us repeatedly falls on deaf ears.
Author Henry David Thoreau, who is best known for his book, “Walden,” a reflection upon simple living, encouraged people to simplify. Thoreau went into the woods at Walden Pond (a lake in Concord, Massachusetts) and built a small cabin that had room for only one. He stayed there for two years because he believed that reducing our worldly footprint helps to focus one on truth and beauty.
Living an uncluttered life increases our gratefulness for what we have. He wrote, “Give me that poverty that knows true wealth.”
Thoreau epitomized the notion of resisting the noise and embracing the slowness.
It is said that the primary reason for being unhappy is wanting things to be different from the way they are, which reminds me of what Bob Welch, the author of “52 Little Lessons from It’s a Wonderful Life,” said. “Funny how so many young people desperately want to grow up and how many older people desperately want to grow “down”— go back to a younger age. What’s wrong with being content where you are?”
I put forth that the most difficult part of becoming content is that it is something that cannot be taught; it must be caught! Perhaps the closing lyrics from a 1969 Rolling Stones’ song will help us catch contentment, but more importantly, grasp it and apply its magic: “You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need.”
Harry Pappas Jr. CFP®
Managing Director-Investments
Master of Science Degree Personal Financial Planning
Certified Estate & Trust Specialist ™
Certified Divorce Financial Analyst™
Pappas Wealth Management Group of Wells Fargo Advisors
818 North Highway A1A, Ste. 200
Ponte Vedra, Florida 32082
904-273-7955
harry.pappas@wellsfargoadvisors.com
Investment and Insurance Products are: Not Insured by the FDIC or Any Federal Government Agency. Not a Deposit or Other Obligation of, or Guaranteed by, the Bank or Any Bank Affiliate. Subject to Investment Risks, Including Possible Loss of the Principal Amount Invested
The use of the CDFA™ designation does not permit Wells Fargo Advisors or its Financial Advisors to provide legal advice, nor is it meant to imply that the firm or its associates are acting as experts in this field.
The opinions expressed in this report are those of the author(s) and are subject to change. The material has been prepared or is distributed solely for information purposes and is not a solicitation or an offer to buy any security or instrument or to participate in any trading strategy. Additional information is available upon request.
Investment products and services are offered through Wells Fargo Advisors, a trade name used by Wells Fargo Clearing Services, LLC, Member SIPC, a registered broker-dealer and non-bank affiliate of Wells Fargo & Company. CAR-1220-03146
